We all want our children to explore the world without fear and tackle challenging and unfamiliar situations with confidence; however, the process of growing and maturing, and learning how to be in the world, can knock children’s confidence at various points. It’s our job as parents to help build their self-esteem back up when this happens, and give them the tools they need to be resilient. Here’s some advice from a private school in Beaconsfield on what you can do to raise a confident child.
Encourage risk-taking (within reason)
Take every opportunity to push your child out of their normal comfort zone so their confidence builds as they try new things. Taking on new challenges and achieving goals will boost their self-esteem as they learn that they’re capable of many different things. The risks don’t have to be massive – it could just be approaching a child they don’t know at a party or raising their hand in class to answer a question when they’re normally silent. If you notice something in particular that your child avoids doing, encourage them to tackle it head-on rather than shy away from it. This will lessen their fear of it and increase their confidence in themselves.
Set realistic goals
If your child has unrealistic expectations about things they try and do, and then end up failing to reach those targets, this can dent their confidence. We want our kids to believe they can do anything, but we could inadvertently be setting them up for failure by encouraging unlikely ambitions. While we should tell our children to reach for their dreams, it can help to keep a sense of perspective and remind them of the things they’vealready achieved and how the journey is just as important as the destination.
Let your child do things themselves
Try and resist the urge to jump in too quickly when you see your child struggling with something. Offer your support and encouragement, but don’t try to rescue them. It’s important for children to learn to do things independently so they can rely on themselves rather than others, something which will increase their confidence in their own abilities. Of course step in if you absolutely have to, but encourage your child to try it again and do it themselves next time.
To raise confident children we also need to demonstrate confidence ourselves with positive self-talk and by tackling obstacles with optimism so that our child sees that as normal and is therefore more likely to emulate it.